trying everything to get our cats to tolerate each other

jennifer viscontijennifer visconti queensMember Posts: 2,157
edited 9 October, 2005 in Behavior & Training
I am furious with my parents! last year was bad enough when my big sister died, now three weeks ago they brought home a 6 month old kitten! she makes me so mad! my parents read the book "cat vs. cat" and followed all of the advice on how to introduce us...sharing our scents, keeping us separated, trying to make meetings fun with food and play...nothing works! i hate that baby! mom went out and got feliway yesterday, it's supposed to make me calmer, but so far, i'm still mad! i am making mom freak out because i hardly eat lately too. any advice?


  • Angela ClarkAngela Clark Fort SmithMember Posts: 15,094
    edited 27 February, 2006
    Marina\'s mom here: Hi emma, I\'m sorry you\'re having these problems but I understand what your mommy is going through. Tell her this for me: 1) maybe the introduction was done too quickly and you need to start over from scratch and do it a lot slower. 2) I listen to a radio show on Public Radio on Sundays called \"Calling All Pets.\" They have a website so you can see if it is in your area. Or you can listen to it on the internet. The animal behaviorist gets this problem all the time. If there was only one piece of advice I would give from that show it is this: It can take up to SIX MONTHS for cats to adjust to each other. Now read that again, and again, and again. Good. Now whenever you are having trouble, just think of it again. Marina\'s sister Velvet was my first pet ever. I\'ve had her my whole adult life and she was a calm adult when I got her. When I got Marina, she was a wild, playful baby. And Tonks are worse than the average kitten. I was caught totally off guard and I was freaking out too. To add insult to injury, Marina developed ringworm just a few days after I got her (which means it didn\'t come from my house). And she passed it on to Velvet. If it wasn\'t for the \"six months\" piece of advice, I probably would have gotten rid of Marina but I am SO GLAD that I didn\'t. I love her so much. For us it took six months to get rid of the ringworm and seven months before we all adjusted. And that was ok because with twice a week baths for both cats and topical meds and vacuuming all the time (which they both hate), it was a very stressful time for them. I\'m surprised it only took that long. Marina is still a jealous baby and if Velvet is getting attention from me, she usually has to get in there and sit closer to me or play with the toy or eat more food or whatever because she is the spoiled princess. But she really is a great cat. Be patient and if you ever just need a sounding board or whatever, feel free to message me and I\'ll write back asap. Let us know how it goes. Angie (Marina\'s mommy)
  • jennifer viscontijennifer visconti queensMember Posts: 2,157
    edited 27 February, 2006
    oh, quit your complaining - you're just jealous of me! i am the cutest and smartest kitten. so there! all you need to do is give me a chance - we could have a lot of fun together!
  • Jennifer NelsonJennifer Nelson St. CloudMember Posts: 18
    edited 27 February, 2006
    In May of this year, one of my humans bought the duplex they were living in and moved to the lower level. Part of the agreement between the old landlady and the human girl was they would keep her 3 year old female cat. We've both had a very hard time adjusting to each other, so the human girl decided to seperate us. At first one of us would be in the bedroom with a litter box and food, and the other would be free to roam the house. The only time we ever saw each other for a while was when the humans were home. After a while, we were only seperated at night, because the humans kept being woken up when they were trying to sleep. Now we are getting along well enough that we are not seperated. We still exchange words and chase each other a few times a day, but each day it gets better and better. If that other girl cat would just learn to worship me, as she should, things would be just peachy.
  • Sara KimbellSara Kimbell Pulaski / Pittsburgh / MarsMember Posts: 38
    edited 27 February, 2006
    Since its only been a few weeks, I really wouldn't worry. Your older cat was so used to "his way" that it will take a period of adjustment. Give it time, he'll establish his "top cat" position and the kitten will learn her place in the world as well. All it takes is time, and patience. Let them howl, fight it out (within reason of course!). Never scold, only praise the two of them after they interact.. that way they'll establish who's on top and who's not. Its taken months for Griz to get used to my parent's cats, but they interact "well," now. (6 months later and they still fight sometimes!)
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