You Know You\'re A Cat Person When...

Lynn PearsonLynn Pearson Houston, TX/Katy,TX/Cypress,TXMember Posts: 39
You Know You're A Cat Person When... You do not consider an outfit complete without some cat hair. You believe there is no such thing as a naughty cat. You decorate your christmas tree with dangly cat toys. Your neighbors refer to you as "the crazy one with all the cats." You set a place at the dinner table for your cat. You snap your fingers and pat the sofa beside you to invite your guests to sit down. You spend more money on toys for your cats than on the kids or grandkids. You have the cat meow on the outgoing message of the answering machine. You chose a house to buy based on it having a good location for the catbox. You consider cat hair in your food as extra fiber. Nobody's feet are allowed on the furniture, but your cats are welcome to sleep on any piece they so choose You sleep on one edge of the bed because the cat is sleeping in the middle looking soooo cute! Vaccination and licensing records for all your cats are in perfect order, but your checkbook hasn't been balanced in months, and last year's tax records are nowhere to be found. You refer to going to the bathroom as "using the litterbox." You accidentally put your child's dinner plate on the floor. You apologize when you step on a fuzzy cat toy in the dark. You refer to your cat as your furry child. Your parents wind up with a four-footed, furry "grandchild." You plan your vacation around the cat show schedule. You accidentally call your spouse by your cat's name! You have a set of towels with "his" "hers" and "kitty's." You call home and leave a message on the answering machine for your cat. You and kitty have matching outfits. You never go to the door unless it's to let a cat out. Your favorite friends have fleas. You think cat fur makes a wonderful garnish to any meal. You own 17 varieties of kitty-nail-clippers. You are lost for conversation with non-cat people. You meow so well, you confuse the cats. You bore the neighbors with discussions on the exact nutritional differences between cat foods 90 percent of your Internet connection time goes to the cats (seeing what's new when you enter your cat's breed into the browser, reading cat newsgroups, viewing photos, sounds and faqs, etc.). All dates must pass your cat's inspection All kinds of things around the house are in need of repair, but the injured cat you rescued by the side of the road requires immediate surgery and out comes the checkbook All of your charitable donations go to cat-related and humane society groups. All of your clothes have cat hair on them, even when they come back from the laundromat or dry cleaners. All of your furniture came to you second hand or via curbside discard, but your cat furniture is top of the line. All your social activities revolve around other cat people Your voice is recognized by your vet's receptionist Any conversation you're having is effortlessly directed back to the topic of cats Anyone can look at your (pick all that apply) --- T-shirt - sweatshirt - coffee mug - keychain - beach towel - cooking apron - couch throw - tote bag - computer screen saver/wallpaper/mousepad/wristpad/monitor frame - gift wrapping paper - photographic displays - calendars - refrigerator magnets - weather vane - door mat - bumper stickers - umbrella - Christmas sweater - socks - embroidery project - child's collection of stuffed animals - sheets and bedspread - checks - checkbook covers - throw pillows - Home Pages --- and know immediately that you are a cat lover, AND probably what particular breed you favor. At least three of your five weeks vacation are scheduled around grooming, vaccinations and dental cleaning for the cats! Books and movies are ruined for you if the cat references are incorrect. Call long distance and talk with your cat. Complete strangers call you on the phone to ask questions because they heard you were a" cat person" Cut your vacations to 3 day weekends only. Every gift you ever get has something to do with cats If you are cold, you put a sweater on your cat. Kiss your cat more than 10 times per greeting. You are on an email list with other cat people and each one of them feels like more than family. Lintwheels are on your shopping list every week. More than half your grocery money goes to cat food and treats Most of your social life is with other cat people. Most of your vacation pictures are of cats around the world. No matter how large your bed is, it is not large enough for you and your cat(s). On your 1040 form all your charitable donations are to Humane Societies, Shelters and Rescue groups. One of your vet files is labeled "Other" Onlookers grimace at the sight of you sharing your sandwich with your cat, bite for bite Order 250 Xmas photos of just the cat, no family in photos. Order 5x7 photos of the kids and order 16x20 pictures of your cat. Overnight guests (who share your bed) are offended by having to sleep with you and the cat(s) Poop has become a source of conversation for you and your significant other. Relative solidity of cat excrement is a suitable topic for discussion in mixed company. You get birthday cards for each of your cats from family, friends, and the vet. (Bonus if you keep them on the refrigerator for more than a month.) The family's eye doctor is located in town, but the cat's ophthalmologist is located a two-hour drive away. The first question you ask when on a date is: "So, do you like animals?" The guardians of your cats will receive a larger amount of insurance policy money than will all other members of your family, combined. The highlight of your day is spending time with your cat. The instructions to the cat kennel/sitter are longer than the instructions to the house sitter. The largest display of collectibles in the house is cat stuff -- plates, photos, cards, etc. The most exciting times on vacations, no matter where in the world you go, is when you get to pet a cat (a "feline fix"). The only (or at least first) forum you log onto is the animal forum The only thing your friends, colleagues, and passing acquaintances say to you when they see you is, "How are the cats?" or "How many cats do you have now?" The part of your will dealing with your cats is longer than any other part. The thought of changing a baby's diaper makes you swoon, but you can pick up cat poop barehanded, if necessary, without batting an eye The whereabouts of all your important legal and personal documents escapes you, yet you know precisely where to locate the file that includes all the vet records. When you need someone to talk to, your cat is your first choice. While proudly showing off your family album, your guest asks, "Isn't there anyone else in your family besides the cat?" You and the cat come down with something like flu on the same day. Your cat sees the vet while you settle for an over-the-counter remedy from the drugstore. You and your family haven't had your annual check up in two years, but the cats are all medically up to date You are unbelievably pleased to receive a cat item (any cat item) as a gift --especially from a "non-cat" friend. (They really cared even if it's not your breed.) You avoid vacuuming the house as long as possible because your cat is afraid of the vacuum cleaner. You become paranoid about keeping ID on your cat at all times (collar, tags, microchip, etc...), but don't bother to carry any ID yourself. You become the family cat kennel/sitter for all your relatives You believe every cat is a lap cat. You believe it is your duty to talk to, pat, and even feed every cat in the neighborhood. You know their names. You break down and buy another pillow so you can have one to sleep on You buy a bigger bed that will comfortably sleep six You buy premium quality cat kibble for your cat, but live on take-out, frozen pizza, and blue-box macaroni and cheese yourself. You can only remember people by associating them with their cat You can't fully enjoy yourself without your cat. You carry pictures of your cat in your wallet instead of pictures of your parents, siblings, significant other, or anyone else remotely human. You celebrate cat events (new cat, cat birthday, etc.) by throwing catered parties with lots of people--but you ignore your own birthday. You change jobs so you can spend more time with the cats. You describe your children as having temperaments rather than personalities You don't go to happy hours with co-workers any more because you need to go home and see your cat. You don't mind it when you find cat hair in the sink, tub, embedded in the carpet or your clothes, or mixed in your food. (Take an extra point if you don't bother trying to remove the hair from your food). You don't think twice about sitting on the floor because both the couch and the chair are completely cat full You don't think twice about trading licks of an ice cream cone with your cat. You hang around the cat section of your local bookstore. You hate posing for pictures unless you're with your cat. You have 32 different names for your cat. Most make no sense, but the cat understands them all. You have a bad day and decide that your cat is the best "person" to talk it over with. You have extra cat collars on the walls, grooming tools on the TV and sofa, cat beds strewn across all flat surfaces, kibble crud around the base of your cabinets, chew toys everywhere, cat-fur dust rhinos skidding across the carpet, and a long line of drips from the water bowl to the living room across the hardwood floors--and you don't care. (Bonus if you have important company coming and you ignore all the housekeeping in order to groom the cats before company arrives.) You have hundreds of pictures of your cats on your desk at work, in your wallet, etc., but none of your family or yourself. You have kiddie gates permanently installed at strategic locations in the house--but no kids. You have little songs that you sing to your cat. You have no reservations about kissing your cat on the lips, even when you know where his lips have been. You have three Home Pages -- all of them dealing with your cats, your friends' cats, your cats' friends, etc. You have your cat talk to your friends on the phone. You justify the addition of a significant other in your life so you can have someone around to pet sit when you go away on business travel. You keep an extra water dish in your second-floor bedroom, in case your cat gets thirsty at night (after all, her other dish is way down on the first floor). You keep eating even after finding a cat hair in your pasta. You keep license tags from cats that have passed away. You know more about feline nutrition than human nutrition (and it shows). You lecture people on responsible cat ownership. You let the neighbor's cat sleep over. You like people who like your cat. You despise people who don't. You match your furniture/carpet/clothes to your cat. You meet other people with cats, and remember their cat's call name after 30 seconds, but don't get the owner's name until you've met them 2 or 3 times. Last names take 3-4 meetings unless you've heard about the people from other cat people first. You give your cat your last name. You never think about how much money you spend on the cats (or how much debt you could reduce by not having them around). You often claim that it was love at first sight with you and your cat. You put an extra blanket on the bed so your cat can be comfortable. You refer to yourselves as Mommy and Daddy. You send out especially-made holiday cards that feature you and the cats You shovel a zig-zag path in the back yard snow so your cat can reach all her favorite spots. You sign and send birthday/anniversary/Christmas cards from your cat. You sit on the floor if the cat got in the chair first. You snuggle closer to the cat than the person with whom you are sleeping You spend more time and effort grooming your cat than yourself. (And it shows--your cat gets more compliments than you do.) You spend more time on the computer dealing with "cat stuff" than "other stuff" You take bereavement leave when you cat dies. You talk about your cat the way other people talk about their kid. You use kennel disinfectant in the house. You wake in the middle of the night to go to the bathroom and your feet hit a wet spot. You look at the cat in bed with you and he looks at you like "Not me! Must have been one of the other cats." You'd rather stay home on Saturday night and cuddle your cat than go to the movies with your sweetie. You'll buy anything with your cat's breed on it. Your "Welcome" sign has a cat on it. Your bedspread doesn't have to coordinate with the bedroom, as it's always covered with a sheet for the cats, anyway. Ditto for the couches. Your carpeting matches the color of your cat - purposely Your children (wife, husband, etc.) Complain that you always take more pictures of the cat than you do of them Half your laundry is cat blankets, sheets, and beds. (Bonus: Your cat was sick on them and you have to sneak into the local laundromat at midnight to do the wash.) Your cookie jar has never seen the likes of people cookies Your desk proudly displays your cat family Your cat brings a dead mouse/bird/ into the kitchen and generously gives it to you with a big smile. You say "For me? Thank you." and take it for granted it is just another day. Your cat decides he doesn't like someone and you tend to agree Your cat does something wonderfully cute, and you call your friends to tell them about it. (Bonus: The call is long distance, to a non-cat person, and you keep them on the line for more than 2 hours.) Your cat eats cat poop, but you still let her kiss you (but not immediately afterward, of course). Your cat gets his teeth brushed daily, scaled weekly, and dental cleaning at the vet's every 6-12 months--and you can't remember your dentist's name. Your cat gets regular checkups every 6 months, but you've lived in the state for five years and don't have a doctor yourself. (Score double points on this one if you have a reserve vet lined up for your cats as well.) Your cat gets sick and you sleep next to him in a sleeping bag in the kitchen in case he needs to go out. Your cat has the best birthday party over and above any kid in the entire neighborhood Your cat is getting old and arthritic, so you go buy lumber and build her a small staircase so she can climb onto the bed by herself. Your cat is the star of your Website! Your cat sleeps with you. Your cats eat only the most nutritionally sound food, while your favorite meal is mac'n cheese Your cats have their own Christmas card and gift list -- and they receive cards and gifts in return. Your e-mail address includes your cat's name. Your friends know which chair not to sit in Your license plate, license-plate frame, or bumper sticker mentions your cat or breed. Your medications are available at the drug store down the block, but your cat's medication has to be ordered from and shipped by a specialist. Your mom calls and asks how the grandcats are Your Mother's Day (birthday, anniversary, etc.) present is a kitten. Your parents give up on grandchildren and start to refer to your cats as "your kids" or your children." (Bonus: they start to call them "our grandcats.") Your parents refer to your pet as their grandcat, remember her birthday, and send her greeting cards and gifts. Your personal library is heavy on cat books. Your photo Christmas cards feature your cats (humans optional). Your spouse issues the ultimatum: "It's them or me!" and you have no problem pointing out the suitcase Your trunk has an emergency food kit for any strays you might come across Your vet and grooming bills exceed your rent. Your vet, back-up vet, emergency vet clinic are all programmed speed dials on your telephone. Your vet's office number is the first one on your speed dial list, his home is number two You're more familiar with cat laws than you are with people laws You're willing to pet sit, but not baby sit for friends. You've conducted a taste test for cat food by buying multiple brands of food and evaluating your cat's interest in each one. (Extra points if you made a party out of it and invited other friends and their cats over. Or tasted it yourself.) You've considered moving into the kennel since it's cleaner than your house. You've had long meaningful discussions with your friends on the best way to trim your cat's nails, but have never had a manicure or pedicure in your lifetime. You've memorized the vet's phone number. (Bonus points if you have his home phone memorized as well.) Your desire to collect cats intensify during times of stress You think it's cute when your cat swings on your drapes or licks your butter You don't admit to non-cat owners how many cats you really have You sleep in the same position all night because it annoys your cats when you move You kiss your cat on the whiskers You feed your cat tidbits from the table with your fork Your cat sleep on your head You have more than four opened but rejected cans of cat food in the refrigerator You watch bad TV because the cat is sleeping on the remote You stand at the open door indefinitely in the freezing rain while your cat sniffs the door, deciding whether to go out or come in. You give your cat presents and a stocking at Christmas You put off making the bed until the cat gets up


  • edited 19 January, 2008
    MOL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Mommy can't stop giggling! Too true!!!!!!!!!!!!! |^||^||^||^||^||^||^||^||^||^||^||^||^||^|
  • Karin PruessnerKarin Pruessner DurbanMember Posts: 2,110
    edited 19 January, 2008
    *lookingcomfoosed* .....aaaaand, what's wrong with that??
  • Cheryl DunningCheryl Dunning winnipeg, mbMember Posts: 5
    edited 22 February, 2008
    :))=D> very funny and true
  • belinda wilkinsonbelinda wilkinson woodwardMember Posts: 15
    edited 25 February, 2008
    ok who been looking in our window! lol
  • Pamela HaneyPamela Haney Old ForgeMember Posts: 893
    edited 26 February, 2008
    OMG that was SOOOOOO funny. But SOOOO TRUE!!!!! :r:r:r I am guilty of continuing to eat food after removing cat hair from it.... MOL
  • pinkkittypinkkitty Member Posts: 6 ✭✭
    edited 3 April, 2008
    I was laughing so hard I had tears rolling down my face. I am guilty of almost all of these. LOL
  • Charity JonesCharity Jones Valencia, San Fernando Valley,Member Posts: 423
    edited 3 April, 2008
    Oh, Gosh! Our mom said yes to about all of those items listed above!:)) Here\'s another one (she actually said this, too): You say to your friend, \"That was so funny it had me meowing out loud!\"
  • naomi codynaomi cody Charm CityMember Posts: 537
    edited 4 April, 2008
    mom is guilty of almost all charges MOL!!!!! and dern proud of it!! our mom is punk, and planning to do a tattoo tribute to us:D. some of her piercings even have cat charms. and all of us were holiday kitties. me on her birthday & anniversary, spike mother's day, morti xmas, lydia valentine's day:))!:c9 she however feels she's not a "crazy cat lady" she refers to everyone else as "crazy non-cat people" or cat challenged.
  • Denine BlevinsDenine Blevins CharlotteMember Posts: 357
    edited 5 April, 2008
    How about: You wake up in the morning with a sore back because you spent the night sleeping "around" your assorted friends. Momma's guilty of that one.:))!
  • Patricia ParkerPatricia Parker ClevelandMember Posts: 1,093
    edited 7 April, 2008
    I love it. Oh yes, all true. =D> =D> =D>
  • Patricia ParkerPatricia Parker ClevelandMember Posts: 1,093
    edited 7 April, 2008
    Another one: your cat follows you into the bathroom and sit and watches.
  • Sarah_PinkSarah_Pink Chapel HillMember Posts: 153 ✭✭
    edited 10 May, 2008
    Vinnie: Mommy closes the bathroom door now because of that. Mommy also checks on us about 2-3 times just before she leaves the apartment to make sure we're ok.
  • Gimli_TGMGimli_TGM HurstMember Posts: 29,929 ✭✭
    edited 10 May, 2008
    Yep, mom usually has three cats on the average every time she goes into the bathroom (and sometimes Trinity, the dog, goes in there too). Now since my half-sister Fay and Fara are staying with us, they go in there too. I go in the bathroom almost every time. :))
  • Jo MillerJo Miller Member Posts: 1,915
    edited 10 May, 2008
    :)) Those are Funny!! How about this one? You put off going to the bathroom until you absolutely can not stand it, because your cat is sleeping on your lap/legs.
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 12 May, 2008
    Gee, I thought ours was the only family where everybody goes into the bathroom with Meowmy. Some of us even sit on her lap if it\'s one of those occasions when the toilet trip looks like it\'s going to last for a while. :D
  • edited 12 May, 2008
    We agree with sleep very uncomfortable at night to prevent from disturbing the kitties. This is an every night thing here. Can you imagine the four of us all snuggled close to mommy. So close that she can't hardly breath without waking us. :c9 We also get more snail mail and E-Mail than mommy does.=D> Love all your answers...keep them going. Your'e all great.:))
  • Faye DufourFaye Dufour Destrehan, LA/New Orleans areaMember Posts: 4,648
    edited 12 May, 2008
    Ha......Ha!!! We do ALL those things.....and of course meowmy still loves us...Also, she has mentioned that between the four of us cats we go to more parties and have more e-mails that she does. And this is a problem??????:))!:))!:))! Oh, and she recognizes different meows.....we have taught her to understand CAT....the most difficult language in the world!!!! Purrs, Benny Grunch, Emma Barrett, Louis Armstrong & Pete Fountain
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