I want to have babies!

2

Comments

  • Alexis McCabeAlexis McCabe Member Posts: 942
    edited 5 June, 2008
    I asked my meowmy for a set of neuticles when she takes me down for that "big snip"... I'm the smallest one in the house and I just don't want to get any smaller.. But she won't let me...:^:
  • P IngramP Ingram EaganMember Posts: 7,400
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Why do the boys get everything. I never had babies so my "milk parts" arent as big as some other kitties. Should mommy get me some implants too?
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Winnie--I\'ve heard that Human females get bigger up there when they\'ve had babies, but don\'t know about cats. Hmm... Perhaps more to the point is, would that make you more attractive to the guys? I bet boycats aren\'t as interested in that part of your anatomy as they are about other parts, but who knows? I\'m not Intact, so my brain doesn\'t get those boycat signals (at least not very much). I DO know (since I stay up at night, when Meowmy\'s sleeping, surfing the Internet with Leila, Chibi, and Spot, and sometimes we look at NAUGHTY sites) that there are some Human men who really go for, er, Human ladies whose \"milk parts\" are really small. The moral of the story is that your natural beauty will appeal to the right person, and I don\'t think you have to augment yourself in any way in order to be attractive. However, if it\'s a matter of self-esteem, maybe you should have a heart-to-heart with your Mommy about it. :-k
  • Lissa NicholsonLissa Nicholson SydneyMember Posts: 1,562
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Benny, I am flattered! What a kind invitation. I am thrilled to accept. A picnic does sound lovely indeed. I am very much an outdoors girl. There is nothing better than the feel of freshly cut grass between your paw pads.
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Suey--I know you've seen on the Marmite thread how Benny's furbrother Pete is courting Tambolina. It's all very decorous, but he just might try to ply you with Marmite, which seems to have a very strange effect on us felines. You might want to take along a chaperone to ward off any untoward advances (a maiden aunt like Miss Lillie would be ideal). "Be Prepared," as the Boy Scout motto goes. ...And, getting back to Neuticles (no, I'm not going to let this topic go away, not just yet!)--are you really sure that you'd like to use a Great Dane's used Neuticles for a "swish" pair of earrings, or perhaps a new pendant for your collar? Do you know how BIG those things must be??? I understand your frustration at having all the gentlemankitties courting Tambolina, but do you really think that (used) Great Dane Neuticle accessories are something that are going to appeal to a real gentleman? :q "With Neuticles®--It's like nothing ever changed!"
  • Faye DufourFaye Dufour Destrehan, LA/New Orleans areaMember Posts: 4,648
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Suey: Wow that is great!! Now we have to get the time coordinated....I live in South Louisiana, and right now it is 9:00 a.m. So in Australia it would be midnight. Please paw mail me and let me know what time would be convenient for you on either Saturday or Sunday (meowmy has a computer at home now). That way we can make definite plans. And Suey, forget using those "used" Neuticles....I think you look fine just the way you are!!! Besides, if you had those big, hairy things hanging from your ears, I would I be able to whisper "sweet nothings" in them.... Excited purrs, Benny Grunch;c;;c; P.S. Don't pay attention to Harvey, I am NOT trying to ply you with Marmite. I will instead ply you with fresh Louisiana shrimp, crabs and crawfish, as well as some nice grilled catfish.....MOL, MOL.......
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    I\'m listening in, guys. Catfish, indeed! What about some of that Boudin stuff? Give her a REAL taste of good ol\' South Louisiana cuisine! :D Also, Suey dear, I\'m a bit worried about that \"Excited purrs\" closing to Benny\'s letter. It fairly reeks of lust. It sounds like either Benny or his typist have been dipping into the Marmite a bit heavily this morning. His brother Pete is much more refined, if you ask me. ...BTW--If you insist on keeping on with this international romance (or just want to figure out what time it is in some other Catster\'s country), I highly recommend saving \"The World Clock\" to your \"My Favorites\" list. The URL is: http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/ Well, for the nonce, I\'ll leave you two to your sparking, but I\'ll be back later with more to say about our sponsor, Neuticles. :q \"Never leave home without them.\"
  • P IngramP Ingram EaganMember Posts: 7,400
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Hey anyone know the neuticals complaint line phone number? I just went to order myself a pair and did you notice the canine ones come in everything from xsmall to xxlarge. Why do the kitty ones only come in xsmall and small. I personally was better endowed than a chihuahua, thank you very much!!!
  • Nuk AnukNuk Anuk Member Posts: 846
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Oi, Like Chester small or extra small isn't going to cut it... I really must say that I have more *without* than some cats have *with* ...going to Forbes to look up their corporate contact information now.
  • Faye DufourFaye Dufour Destrehan, LA/New Orleans areaMember Posts: 4,648
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Harvey: First, don't worry......I have only the most honorable intentions for Miss Suey. "Excited Purrs" was only to indicate that I was happy that she accepted my invitation. Hmmmmm Boudin, did not think about that....will have to tell meowmy to put that on her shopping list for the picnic. Lucky she can get it at a local grocery store. And no, we are NOT dipping into the Marmite........don't even have any in the house. Meowmy would have to drive almost 15 miles one way to a store that sells it, and at the price of gas she would have to be able to be kissed by George Clooney when she bought the Marmite to make the trip worth it. MOL, MOL..... We appreciate your concern about my intentions to Miss Suey....shows what a well-bred gentleman cat you are. Catch Ya Later, Benny Grunch...|/h/||/h/|
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    In the \"Ideas for new emoticons\" thread, I opine that hamsters are out of place on a cat site, except as prey. Rather than dancing hamsters, we should have dancing EVISCERATED hamsters, in order to be more in keeping with a cat-oriented site.
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Hey, at least they didn\'t stop this thread! I\'ve still got A LOT left to say about those Neuticles. Geez, joking about cat overpopulation, talking about fake nether regions--we\'re lucky to still be here! ;c; ;c; ;c;
  • terri echolsterri echols kalamazooMember Posts: 4,758
    edited 5 June, 2008
    you\'re not going to believe this...my roommate got an email just the other day from one of the dozens of forums she belongs to, about this very subject. one of the dogs at a dog show was cryptorchic-in this case undescended rather than just plain not there-so the owner had provided him with a neuticle to compensate in order to show him. well, either the owner was sleeping during the pre-show grooming or mother nature got together with father time in the interim between grooming and show...and by the time the dog was judged, he was a three-ball wonder. to quote the judge: \"i think you can have them remove the neuticle now...\" |/h/||/h/|it\'s a mad mad mad world|/h/||/h/| p.s.: re: emoticons...check out kaya & shyloh\'s photo book...the last pic (stuck it there to avoid scaring seven year olds and making pregnant women puke) is a prime example of true prey. doesn\'t look like HE\'S going to dance any jigs anytime soon:D...no guts, guys...just a dead mousie. but i\'m right proud of my critters, and i agree the dancing hamster is far too happy to be prey...put some crosses on his eyes? make him dart about in panic? he\'s on CATSTER, for crying out loud! he should be afraid, he should be very afraid! if my cats went after a rodent that was that happy, i\'d rescue THEM...be afraid it might be contagious, for one thing...they break enough glasses as it is)
  • Lissa NicholsonLissa Nicholson SydneyMember Posts: 1,562
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Oh my dear Benny, how exciting!! I will have my mummy check my diary for me!!!:-h Harvey, I think you are right. I might give those neuticles a miss. What was I thinking!
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Yes, Miss Suey, they are so, just, not YOU. ;P
  • Annalisa Conserti-JonesAnnalisa Conserti-Jones Member Posts: 5,234
    edited 5 June, 2008
    kaya and shiloh, a three testicled dog. That's funny! Mom says that last week she saw a non-neutered pit bull being walked, and said that it definitely made her realize she prefers her pets neutered. There's less swaying and sashaing that way. :))
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Kaya Skye and Shyloh--You\'re a hoot! I wonder if the judge was able to say that with a straight face. But think of the timing--how could an undescended testicle just drop down bong! right before a show? A three-balled wonder...he should have gotten a special ribbon! Actually, in cat shows, I\'ve shown Harvey in the neutered class, and my girls in the unneutered class, and come to think of it, I\'m not sure how/when they check the gonad status of the animal. The problem would be more in the Championship Class (unaltered) than in the Premiership Class (altered), as the former is more prestigious. Thus, I could imagine someone who didn\'t want to put up with Mr. Stinky Tom Cat to have him altered and then Neuticled and put him in the Championship ring. I HAVE heard rumors of show animals getting cosmetic surgery, especially in the face (Henry could use more erect--oops, baaaaad word--ears, and a more pronounced muzzle, and both Leila and Chibi need more of a dip in their noseline). These tiny imperfections can make or break a cat\'s show career. Anyway, back to my original topic, which was, when do the judges check to see if the cat is Intact or not? With a short haired cat, it\'s obvious at first glance, but with long haired cats like Harvey, the judge must have to do some feeling around to see that he is indeed flat down there, although as I said, there\'s not as much prestige in the Premiership competition as in the Championship Class, so who would bother to pretend that their altered cat is unaltered? Maybe because it\'s less competitive...However, in the Championship Class, the judges definitely have to feel up the animal, to make sure it\'s got two healthy specimens (and not one or three!). But how do they identify spayed/unspayed females? Hmm...I have a friend who just became a judge, I\'ll ask her. Har har har, feeling up a cat\'s gonads--what a job. That, and Marmite breath hissing. LOVED the dead mousie! That\'s the way to go! It sure looked dead, all right, though not eviscerated. Aww. I seem to remember that Catster Community Guidelines say that you can have only ONE pic on your page that is not of your cats, and that it must be a family member. I had an x-ray of my artificial hips up for a while. Well, if anyone asks, tell them it was a distant relative who met with an untimely demise. Making pregnant women puke, har har... >doesn\'t look like HE\'S going to dance any jigs anytime soon...no guts, guys...just a dead mousie. but i\'m right proud of my critters, and i agree the dancing hamster is far too happy to be prey...put some crosses on his eyes? Ha ha, love the \"crosses on his eyes\" part. Check out Chibi\'s page--I found a Hello Kitty avatar which moves--her eyes are crossed out and blood spurts out, then she\'s miraculously healed, and the whole thing starts again. I\'m not quite sure what Sanrio had in mind when they created that. Chibi\'s caption: \"This is how I looked before my cosmetic surgery.\" Oh, and my cats\' sites are now all presently \"under deconstruction.\" I think we should have a contest for the TACKIEST Catster page, and I\'m working toward being a contender. Harvey is all Smiley\'s and has the \"Rocky\" theme in the background. Can you say \"so 70s\"? :P
  • Faye DufourFaye Dufour Destrehan, LA/New Orleans areaMember Posts: 4,648
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Suey: Good.....now will just wait for you to check your diary. I am so excited........oh, I almost forgot. The place where we will have our picnic is a big piece of ground 17 acres. Since it is very hot here right now, I have arranged to have us ride around in a little wagon. The dog who lives on the property next door is a big black Labrador named Clementine. She said she would be glad to pull us in the wagon so your would not be overcome by the heat (it has been over 90 degrees every day this week). And there is a cover over the wagon as well, to protect your delicate ears and nose. Looking forward to the picnic, Benny Grunch
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Ah, but Boris--you\'re not a Pit Bull, as far as I can tell. I have a feeling that the lady Pit Bulls (hard to imagine female Pit Bulls, but anyway...) must like that \"swinging and sashaying.\" And I bet the dog himself does--you know how Human men are, always fiddling with the positioning of their Fruit of the Looms. (Geez, I was going to write \"Fruit of Their Loins.\" Ay yay yay.) :n:
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Psst, Benny--If you want to protect Miss Suey\'s delicate sensibilities, I would recommend that you do not expose her to said Labrador\'s nether regions. He may be Intact...he may be sporting Neuticles. A Labrador\'s hanging glory is sure to be too much for a sheltered young lady of good upbringing. :q Neuticles--Only your hairdresser knows for sure.
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Kaya Skye and Shyloh--I rechecked the Community Guidelines, and they say that a photo of a \"friend\" is okay. So make Mr. Mousie a \"friend,\" although, alas, one of short acquaintance. (*insert Smiley with FANGS here*)
  • Annalisa Conserti-JonesAnnalisa Conserti-Jones Member Posts: 5,234
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Harvey, mom was thinking in terms of future dogs, though. She's a cat person at heart, but dad likes dogs, and she also has a weakness for certain kinds of dogs (golden retrievers, be they show quality or mixes, and dachshunds) so she's vowed that if we ever live someplace with a yard, she might just get a dog someday (mom says she would get it as a wee pup so I'd get used to it, but I'm not sure whether I'll like the deal at all :-/).
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Boris--Well, in that case, snip away!!! Who wants an unneutered dog in their household, anyway? But what about the Pit Bull--do unneutered dogs spray and do other icky stuff like unaltered tom cats do? :-k
  • Annalisa Conserti-JonesAnnalisa Conserti-Jones Member Posts: 5,234
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Mom has never been owned by a dog, so she couldn't say. Dad has always had neutered dogs at home as a kid, but he claims that some (not all) unneutered dogs will basically hump everything that moves, including human legs. I wouldn't think that would be pleasant to suffer on a regular basis.
  • terri echolsterri echols kalamazooMember Posts: 4,758
    edited 5 June, 2008
    the all-time award for phantom humping goes to a different species..the bunny. i once had a black and white buck named Zach-yep, you got it, Zach-Rabbit:D and he persistently humped my right foot. persistently, constantly, indefatigably...it was bunny love. (and no, i was not wearing bunny slippers) perhaps we should have gotten Zach neutered? i suppose they neuter rabbits...if they don\'t they should. i mean...they breed like RABBITS!!
  • terri echolsterri echols kalamazooMember Posts: 4,758
    edited 5 June, 2008
    harvey...yes, i worried about the propriety of the mousie pic, as the mouse is pictured alone. (well, part of my hand is in the pic, does that count?) i\'m considering identifying him as a former roommate...
  • Sandi MahanaSandi Mahana Member Posts: 4,011
    edited 5 June, 2008
    LOL Harvey your a real goof-ball :))
  • Valerie DurhamValerie Durham Member Posts: 8,724
    edited 5 June, 2008
    Okay, Kaya Skye has just opened up an entirely new topic: things animals hump. Hey, we know they do it, they know they do it, let\'s get things out in the open. My best friend\'s female Persian used to have a monthly tryst with a big bump in the carpet around once a month, looking very hepped up as she humped. Well? Any takers? :-h
  • Sandi MahanaSandi Mahana Member Posts: 4,011
    edited 6 June, 2008
    I sometimes mount Odie (my canine brother):))
  • SterlingAndTheSTeamSterlingAndTheSTeam Mount OliveMember Posts: 41,262 ✭✭✭
    edited 6 June, 2008
    Careful, guys . . .
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