I have a new big sister! But we have issues...

Carolyn SmithCarolyn Smith GrapevineMember Posts: 31
edited 23 December, 2008 in Behavior & Training
About a week and a half ago, my mom brought home a big sister for me. She adopted her from the breeder she got me from and her name is Chloe. Since I'm still a kitten all I want to do is play, play, play. Chloe is five years old and doesn't want to play with me. Instead, she hisses, tries to swipe me with her paw and meows loudly and growls. Today we were even rolling around on the floor! Mommy is worried that we were introduced too soon since she lives in an apartment and it was hard to keep us seperated. She doesn't know if this is fighting or playing. Another thing, Chloe doesn't have any claws but I do. So she can swat at me all she wants and it doesn't bother me!! Mommy's afraid I might start fighting back. She's wondering if anyone has tried reintroducing cats. Does that actually work? Or should she just let us work it out ourselves. Thanks

Comments

  • Joy WaltersJoy Walters Member Posts: 9,276
    edited 17 December, 2008
    Take a moment to really observe Chloe and Cosette. Do you see Cosette\'s claws? Is Chloe pulling out fur? When I introduced Izzie and Lily Rose, Izzie went straight up in the air, turned around while he was up there and then scooted under our bed where he and his other sister, Delilah, hid for 3 days. It\'s very rare for an older female, especially if she\'s had kittens, to take an instant dislike to a younger one. Delilah will occasionally swat at Lily also, but not with any vicious intent. It\'s just her way of telling the kid, \"Hey, I was here first and you\'d better mind!\" Cats set their own ground rules. Have you ever seen a pride of lions on Animal Planet or Discovery Channel? Even when cubs get a little rambunctious with their aunts and/or uncles, the aunt or uncle will swat at them or put their mouths on the back of the kid\'s neck and say, \"hey! behave!\" I don\'t believe that Chloe and Cosette are aware that they\'re related. What I DO think is that Chloe is setting the ground rules for Cosette. Sometimes it does sound nasty. My late, sweet Ernie used to howl bloody murder when he and Izzie would play. When my husband was video-ing my grandson one time last summer, one of the loudest things on the film is Ernie shrieking at Izzie. And, they were just playing! However, I would not leave your two girls unsupervised if for no other reason than to help Chloe discipline Cosette if the baby gets a little out-of-hand. You can also help the furrendship by playing with both of them together. You are, after all, the mom now. And, if Cosette isn\'t spayed, now is a good time to consider it. Eve spayed females (and males) do get a little territorial, but with your love, guidance, vigilance and patience, things will all work out for the 3 of you!
  • Carolyn SmithCarolyn Smith GrapevineMember Posts: 31
    edited 17 December, 2008
    Thanks for the reply, Izzy. We always thought the same thing about Chloe and Cosette-that Chloe was setting ground rules and letting Cosette know what is acceptable and what is not. Cosette is a very determined kitten. Chloe will hiss, growl, swat at her numerous times and the baby will just sit back, look at her for a second and then go pouncing on her again. It's almost like she won't take no for an answer. I suppose it will just take time. Thanks.
  • Joy WaltersJoy Walters Member Posts: 9,276
    edited 17 December, 2008
    You\'re very welcome. Cosette is a super-cutie, by the way! After the two of them have been together for a while, you\'ll be able to tell from the pitch and tone of the hisses whether Chloe needs to be bailed out. Cosette will calm down. Izzie was a little over a year before he stopped torturing Ernie. You may even notice that Chloe will want to play with Cosette after a while because Cosette looks like she\'s having so much fun, Chloe will want to get in on it. One day when Cosette is grown up, you may get another kitten who will \"pay Cosette back\" for what she did to Chloe!! Happy Holidays!
  • shiz carlsonshiz carlson Member Posts: 15
    edited 17 December, 2008
    I had a similar issue. I just got a new little sister and although she\'s four years old all she wants to do is play play play! Sometimes I\'ll be having a lovely nap, and she\'ll come up to me and try to wake me up! So rude, right? Don\'t get me wrong, I love my sister, but sometimes she works my nerves and I have to hiss and (somewhat embarassing) smack her! MommyKat often didn\'t know if we were fighting or playing. Should she let us be or interfere? The vet told her that she\'d know if it was actual fighting as there would be some serious injuries. Over time we have gotten to know each other better and there is less hissing and more obvious play.
  • Anastasia OBrienAnastasia OBrien Member Posts: 15
    edited 17 December, 2008
    My mom moved into a new home over the summer and there was another cat there already...Zoey...even though I am the man and older than her, she was there first, I had to follow the Cat Rule Book and give her space until she got used to me being in her home. I try to be her friend and play and she plays with me sometimes but other times, she makes it clear that she doesn't want me around her. Sometimes, I'll just be sitting somewhere or playing with a toy on the floor and she'll just swat me and hiss. Unless one of us has our ears back, and there is a lot of growling & hissing, our moms know that we're just playing.
  • Joy WaltersJoy Walters Member Posts: 9,276
    edited 19 December, 2008
    That\'s very true. I don\'t think I\'d follow the vet\'s opinion and wait until there were \"serious injuries\" though. He must have been just kidding....I hope. :-k Lily Rose, at 7 pounds, let\'s Izzie (at 15 pounds) know in no uncertain terms when things have gone too far. To me, this is a prime example of \"Torbie \'Tude\" which other members of Catster told me about when I was considering adopting a Torbie (tortiseshell/tabbie) She will put her ears back, hiss and swat at him. They were wrestling on my lap, of all places, last night and I was in fear for the well-being of my kneecaps and other bodily areas, but when Lily Rose hissed, Izzie backed off and went to climb up in the Christmas tree and sulk. Cats are VERY good at setting their own ground rules with each other, usually without human interference.
  • Annalisa Conserti-JonesAnnalisa Conserti-Jones Member Posts: 5,234
    edited 19 December, 2008
    My goodness Iz, you two were fighting on mommy's lap? And she let you? Mom has let us know on no uncertain terms that we can play wrestle all we want, but not on mommy's laps or near her ankles or her head (we tried, believe me). She hisses at us to tell us to take it elsewhere. Gracie sometimes doesn't take the hint and mom then scuffs her and puts her on the floor, but I usually march when I hear that hiss. Mommy can be as scary as a big cat when she hisses. :r Anyway, like Izzie said, your girls are learning to read each other. At first I wanted nothing to do with Gracie, and would hiss and swat at her all the time. Even when I started to warm to her, I always wanted to set the rules of when they play and when they don't. She was a tiny kitten when we got her, and I was almost 2, but mom says I was very set in my ways. But as time has gone on, I've found that it's nice to just play whenever the kitten wants to play. Just be patient, monitor for distress (yelping and excessive growling), and let them work it out.
  • Joy WaltersJoy Walters Member Posts: 9,276
    edited 19 December, 2008
    Well, Boris, it wasn\'t really \"fighting\" as such. They were sleeping together and Izzie put his leg over Lily\'s side. She started chewing on his leg and that woke him up. He sat up, swatted at her and then it started. But Lily looked like she was biting Izzie\'s neck and then she was washing his head. He tapped her on the head (no claws) and then kind of bit her on the neck. Then, HE started washing her face. Since it was about 18 degrees in Cleveland, Ohio last night, mom wasn\'t really too keen on throwing two warm kitties off her lap. But my point is that it didn\'t escalate into a full blown war and when Lily Rose hissed, like Boris\' mom said, it was over. Like Boris said, it took a while for him and Gracie to accept each other. I remember when Gracie came to live with him. He actually stopped eating and his meowmie was very worried. Now, like Iz and Lily, Boris and Gracie are true brother and sister.|:|
  • Bonnie MarquessBonnie Marquess MarquetteMember Posts: 11
    edited 23 December, 2008
    I am glad I looked at this post. I have two cats, Stormy and Cassie, who I adopted last March. It is hard for me to tell whether they fight or are just play wrestling. They seem to tolerate each other, but all of a sudden they will look at each other, paw each other (both front declawed) and then wrestle. It's like they are licking each other and all of a sudden it's on. Once in a great while I have seen one or the other seem to bite. They don't growl or hiss. Cassie, a tortie, is three to five years old and Stormy is eight to nine years old, female/male spayed and neutered. Cassie is the more adventurous, Stormy is real quiet. Bonnie I have assumed that they are playing for the most part. Bonnie
  • Carolyn SmithCarolyn Smith GrapevineMember Posts: 31
    edited 23 December, 2008
    I figure if I don't see tails fluffed up and the hairs on the back standing on end then it's not anything to really worry about. I guess they will just work it out themselves. Today, I caught Cosette licking Chloe's ear so that's a good sign.
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